Caroline Dickerson
FS 301 Explore Texas
October 17, 2006
Freedom
I am a natural, free-spirited type. I’ve never considered myself to be particularly passionate. I have always just kind of gone with the flow of things. Looking back over my short life, I realize that the most touching experiences I have had have been when I was riding horses, walking on the beach, or traveling. Each of these experiences has made me the strong woman that I am today. I am an independent, fairly quiet girl with a highly developed sense of freedom. To me, freedom isn’t just a repeated word in the Bill of Rights. It’s a word that stands for liberation. Freedom is feeling the wind in my hair while trotting across a pasture, or making an impromptu trip to the beach, or jumping on a train to Granada. Freedom is my passion.
There is nothing like a vacation without an itinerary. Unconstrained traveling is the most enjoyable because it is unforced and natural. This summer, my mom, my brother, and I went to Spain. This was a very unique trip: I had never traveled overseas with my mom, and I had never been to Spain. We went with family friends who had grown up in Europe, which made the trip all the more enjoyable. Marbella was our “home base,” and, from there, we found our way to Granada, Sevilla, and many quaint little villages along the Spanish countryside. I was surprised by how much I enjoyed the Spanish culture. I picked up traditional Spanish customs, such as the paseja. The paseja is when all of the townspeople socialize, window-shop, and just stroll around the village before eating dinner at around ten o’clock. I became accustomed to eating and shopping very late in the day. The Spaniards had picked up these habits over the years as a way to avoid the heat, and I was more than willing to observe these customs! (I just wish Texans would pick up this way of life!) I also loved how friendly the Spanish people are. They liked that I was willing to try to speak to them in their native tongue and were always happy to help improve my Spanish speaking skills!
We decided to spend the last few days of our vacation in London. There was so much to do in this old city. We toured Westminster Abbey, Kensington Palace, and the mysterious Tower of London! We strolled around Hyde Park and even paddled around the park’s lively pond in a rented canoe. My mom and I went to Evensong at St. Paul’s Cathedral, the regal Baroque-style cathedral in which Princess Diana was married and the Queen’s Jubilee was celebrated. We all loved the city of London so much that we decided to stay an extra week!
My mom and I, in front of Big Ben and the Parliament
Building, after walking along the Thames River!
Who can blame us for not wanting to go back to our suburban homes and monotonous lives? Travel is the ultimate luxury. It gives me the most glorious feeling. There is nothing like standing dwarfed below Great Britain’s Parliament Building and being consumed by the chimes of Big Ben’s clock. I must admit that I am addicted to the calm I get from staring in awe of the Rose Window’s stained glass at Notre Dame. It is wonderful to be humbled by a Honduran peasant’s pride or to be brightened by a London cab driver’s jokes. When I travel, I feel as if the world was made just for me and that I am meant to explore and meet my worldwide neighbors.
Patricia Sampson Graner, a political process author, once pointed out, “Self-reliance is the only road to true freedom, and being one's own person is its ultimate reward.”[1] Travel, whether by myself or with my family, has made me a more independent person. I know that I can get through life on my own, if need be, because I have seen and spoken to people all around the world who have gotten by. My passion for traveling has made you understand that if you want something bad enough, I can figure out a way to get it. I have found that even if I don't know the language, I can still figure out how to get around in a strange, new city. I know that, even if my life doesn’t end up as I plan, I will still have travel to lighten (and brighten) my outlook on life.
Ever since I was a little girl, I have liked to take walks. I liked walking in the woods, but I was banned from that at the age of eight when I got lost in the woods. (Since that incident, I might add, I have had an unnatural fear of forests.) Then, I used to walk in my neighborhood and around my town. The problem was people were always stopping me to introduce themselves and then they would want to talk. By the time I had untangled myself from the conversation, it was too late to walk.
I am never interrupted at the beach. There are no questions or greetings from random people, only the sounds of the seabirds. My hometown, Bay City, is twenty minutes from Matagorda Beach. Sometimes, I just stop what I’m doing and drive there; it’s as if I’m drawn to the water and the waves. I love hearing the waves roar, crash, then recede back to the sea. I am able to think about what’s been going on in my life and then release any negativity from my mind. I like to think that negativity goes out to the ocean with the tide.
I’m not a “beach party” person. There are no string bikinis or bottles of suntan oil for me. But I could walk for miles, jumping little waves and searching for sand dollars and sea stones. I especially love the beach when it’s empty – at night or during the winter.
My horse Scooter and I are off for a ride on the beach
in Port Aransas!
My favorite thing to do at home is ride my horses, Scooter and Impressive. They are beautiful, cheerful animals with long glossy manes and lean, muscular bodies. They remind me of Pegasus, the magnificent winged horse of Greek mythology. I can never resist riding them, perhaps because a part of me wishes I could fly around the earth as fast as I feel they can. I love the feeling I get when I ride. I feel like my heart might jump out of my body. I feel giddy with speed. I feel as free as the wind. I feel truly myself!
Because I was born into a ranching family, I was taught to ride before I could even walk. It wasn’t easy learning to ride. It took balance, control, and confidence – not qualities that toddlers usually have. But, with time, I learned and became quite the rider (if I do say so myself)! I quickly learned that riding is most comfortable when riding in rhythm with the horse. You have to be one with the horse – literally move as if you are a part of him. I learned to anticipate what the horse wanted to do and to then manipulate that into what I wanted done. Once I caught on to this skill, riding became addictive. I am always looking for an opportunity to ride. Each time I ride, I love to challenge myself to become more like the horse, carefree and unconstrained.
Every once in a while, I let myself lose control of the horse’s speed. The only control I have over my safety is in my balance. (This is highly dangerous, and I do not recommend it to anyone.) I allow myself to be in the hands of God and the hooves of my horse. I don’t have to think about anything; I can just concentrate on being. Now that I think about it, I guess I would consider this to be a type of meditation. Or maybe I consider it to be nirvana itself!
Whenever I’m
upset, I imagine myself in the saddle.
I think of how the stirrups feel against my boots and how my hands hold
the reins and a bit of Scooter’s mane.
I imagine the sun on my face and the wind pushing back my hair. I begin to smell the dusty musk of the
horse and the leather of the saddle.
Whenever I think of riding, my troubles and constraints melt away. There are times that I wish I could do
nothing but ride for the rest of my life.
“Did you ever see an unhappy horse? Did you ever see a bird
that had the blues? One reason why birds and horses are not unhappy is because
they are not trying to impress other birds and horses.”[2] Dale Carnegie certainly had a
point. And that is exactly why I
like to ride horses, because they are carefree, and they make me carefree
also. Lately, I have taken this
philosophy (not trying to impress other people) into daily life. It has worked wonders.
Janis Joplin sang, “Freedom is just another word for nothing left to lose.”[3] I disagree with her; being free – self-reliant and independent – is a necessary ingredient for happiness. Being able to do what I want, think what I want, just spend time by myself is what keeps me sane. It is everything I have.
Connie Reeves, a
legendary Texas cowgirl and one of my riding instructors, declared many times,
“Always saddle your own horse.”[4] Horseback riding, beach walking, and
traveling have made me the independent, self-reliant young woman I am today. I know that I will always be able to
take care of myself and others. I
have learned to make the right situation when possible, but, if it isn’t
possible, that life will “take the reins” and lead me where I am supposed to
go. I have learned that freedom is
wild and uncontrollable, and that it can take me anywhere. Oh, the places I will go!
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