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Oct. 18 Joyce 135-194. Late late late. I don't get it. It seems
that Stephen gets it off easy, at least in the sense of redemption is
concerned. Stephen's rejection of his
religion when he went on his whoring escapades was easy enough for him to
do. He simply went out and did it, and
then during his school life he sat around in mirth, amused at his position of
respect among the boys and the priests and prefects, all the while knowing what
he had done. Then, there was this
retreat they went on, as we had discussed before, which was the possible
makings of "the epiphany." As we read on, however, it is quite clear that
this was not a true repentance, but one born of fear of damnation. And as easily as easily as he fell into
mortal sin, he was able to expunge the black marks on his soul. The frantic guilt was attributed to "the work
of the devils" there to "scatter his thoughts and overclouded his conscience.
(136)" And how easy it is to blame your sins on something outside of
yourself. Wandering the streets in
search of redemption, he happens upon some poor women and laments because "those
souls were dearer to God than his. (140)"
Thinking such a thing, that it's terrible that people living in squalid
are more important to God, makes you wonder if Stephen felt that before his
fall- that God loved his soul over theirs.
You continue wondering about how Stephen feels God reveres him later on. No worries, Stephen, because "God had
promised to forgive him if he was sorry. (143)" And Oh, "He was sorry. (143)"
Just as easily as he neglected his Catholic duties of confession, of
prayers, and other religious routine, he was forgiven by making a "solemn
promise to God. (143)" With the wave of the priest's hand, he was back in God's
grace, and as long as he doesn't screw up again it should stay that way. So he
promises to God he will be good, he goes about his goal to be even BETTER than
necessary, so wonderful that God would recognize his piety with an extra cushy
spot in heaven. So he goes the extra
mile as far as religion is concerned, and even finds ways of torturing his
senses. He would tempt himself for "It
gave him an intense sense of power to know that he could by a single act of
consent, in a moment of thought, undo all that he had done. (152)" And though he was
saved in God's eyes, he still felt guilty, even after confessing and
repenting. "Perhaps that first
hasty wrung from him by the fear of hell had not been good? (153)" Precisely!
Stephen still knew deep down inside what he had done and that mere
religious forgiveness would not clear his heart. The harder he tried to clear his conscience
with religion, the more he became irritable.
He became irritated at the slightest occurrences, and does not truly
become more kind to the people around him, the way a true pious or
religious person would. He notes
the downfalls of the priests who too get annoyed by petty things. Finally, when the priest offers
Stephen the opportunity to become a priest, it seems this was the type of
validation he had wanted all along. And
the appeal to the job was not out of a love and devotion to God, it was an
itching to know people's secrets. "He
would know obscure things, hidden from others, from those who were conceived
and born children of wrath. (159)" That
right there shows us that his religious fanaticism was merely an act, motions
he went through to make himself sleep better at night. Luckily, as the guilt disappears at this
single offering, Stephen refuses, and now adventure "beckoned to him once more.
(165)" Stephen to me was hypocritically
Catholic, but who's to say that none of us our hypocrites in our dogmatic
beliefs. However, Stephen was the sort
of religious nut who had a high-and-mighty attitude about him, his goal was to
seem more pristine and more worthy in God's eyes compared to all the other
lowly people out there who weren't throwing themselves into religion. Stephen, though, through his maturation,
somehow recognizes this hypocrisy in way, even if he never fully verbalizes it
to himself. Luckily, Joyce and Stephen
took a different route, but what Stephen's is, we don't know yet! I don't
think I could read 60 more pages about a religious zealot. |