Amanda Jones
My Pilgrimage: The Search for Self
Honestly, I never liked swimming at the beach much. The constant tugging and crashing of the waves made relaxing swimming difficult, the salt water tasted horrible when you accidentally got a mouthful, there were jellyfish and crabs lurking around that you had to watch out for, and you always came back with a swimsuit full of sand. Yet even though the ocean was never my top choice over a swimming pool, I would always go back to the beach just to walk along the water’s edge. I loved the feeling of the water rushing over my feet, the squishy sand in my toes, and the search for sea shells along the shore. I always had the desire to find the perfect shells as I walked along, even though I never knew why (what could I do with them, after all?). Now that I am at UT, however, I see an uncanny relationship between my desire to find these perfect sea shells and my desire to find the perfect parts of my own self.
I’m struggling to obey the great commandment embodied in the Greek shrine on top of the Tower, that is, to “know thyself.” To successfully know myself, I feel that I must discover all the pieces of my personality in every facet: intellectual, spiritual, physical, emotional, social. I am exploring my intellectual personality by taking a variety of courses in different fields of study; I am experimenting with different churches and groups in order to grow and strengthen in my faith; I am pushing my body to be it’s best by exercising more and in different ways than I ever have before; I am examining my own thoughts and feelings, especially in such a new environment, to get them firmly under my control; and I am branching out into new groups and situations to make friends and allies.
The few sea shells I picked out of the myriad of shells strewn along the beach caught my eye with their perfection and beauty. I only hope that the pieces of my true character stand out to me with as much clarity as I walk along my college path.
Pictures of Shells at the Paramount Theatre in Downtown
