Forts, Childhoods, and Tom Petty

As a child, I never worried about anything or gave specific situations much thought. I never thought about myself as much as what was going on around me. Instead of thinking about who I wanted to become when I grew older, I built a little fort inside my room with my bedsheets and pillows. And instead of worrying about my own happiness like I do now, I explored my backyard and fed the fish in my pond.

In retrospect, it really seems that no matter how many parties I go to, how many friends or make, or how much sprite I drink now, I cannot replicate the same kind of happiness that I experienced as a child. The problem may be in what Mill suggests: “Those only are happy who have their minds fixed on some object other than their own happiness; on the happiness of others, on the improvement of mankind, even on some art or pursuit, followed not as a means, but as itself an ideal end.” (Mill, Bump 694) Instead of concentrating on my surroundings as a child, I now worry about myself and hardly take any time to explore or discovery anything around me.

The specific kind of happiness that I experienced in my childhood harnesses some kind of “purity” that I cannot solidify today as a “grown-up.” As Edith Cobb points out, this “purity” seems to be a trait that can only be found in childhood. As children, we were able to “match our perceptions and language perfectly” as well as “create our own worlds that are culturally conditioned.” (Cobb, Bump 716) It does not really strike me as a surprise why many writers such as Wordsworth look to their childhoods to write. Instead of writing about ourselves and invoking a kind of personal bias, we are instead subjective observers that are as close to nature as possible, writing “truths.”

“Well I don't know what I've been told

You never slow down, you never grow old.”

Tom Petty and the Heartbreakers

Though the rest of the song isn't really relevant, this particular excerpt popped into my mind as I was typing this entry. Like Mauro, I developed a personal ideal to stick to. As our minds and bodies mature and grow old, we must never forget about our childhoods and where the “purity” lies. We must use our childhoods as tools to aid us in our writing.