Great job Julie! Your front page was so beautiful and crisp. I really like all the colors you chose. I think it would be really nice if you could add pictures etc. to the page your story is on. Adding some paragraph breaks and pictures illustrating what you were looking at would be helpful to the reader. You have great descriptions of what your senses were feeling at certain points along the mountains--add even more if you can. There was one time when you were describing the feeling of winter, how it felt to breathe the air...and your writing was great. I would suggest elaborating on those descriptions. Also, there was a huge build up in the story about getting to the top of the mountain and then the description about your feelings once you got there was pretty short. Overall, your writing is great, I would just like to hear more of it.